You’ve been dating for a while now, and this time it’s different. You think about her for the majority of the day, you wonder about growing old together and most importantly, you know that she’s not like the others. She is The One. Whether you’ve been in a relationship together for six months or six years, there is no definitive right time to propose. If you’ve been thinking about popping the big question but are still a little hesitant, these tips will help you to decide if now is the right time.
You could do it tomorrow
If you propose and she accepts, when do you anticipate the wedding to be? In two years? How about 18 months? In a year? If you’re planning to propose hoping that the actual ceremony won’t take place for a while, then you’re not ready. An engagement isn’t a period to keep her happy whilst you decide if marriage is what you really want. If her response to your proposal was, ‘Yes! Let’s get married next week!’ would you be just as excited, or back out?
You share personal information
A lifelong partner has to be someone who you trust implicitly. You divulge personal information to her because you know that she’s discreet, empathetic and supportive. If you share how much you earn, how much you owe, your health history and the difficult times you’ve had, then you already have your answer. If you’re still withholding certain information, then now is not the time. Why haven’t you told her about the large debt you owe or the amount of savings you have? If you’re worried that she’ll leave you because you owe too much, or that she’s only interested in your money, then for whatever reason, you don’t trust her. Save the proposal until your relationship is secure.
Life is good
If either of you is in a tenuous position in life, a marriage proposal isn’t going to fix that. If you or your girlfriend are facing a difficult time a work, such as a big project, multiple deadlines, or facing lay-offs, wait until the dust has settled and then ask the big question. Similarly, family tragedy, ill health or financial loss are emotional burdens that could mar a perfectly sincere proposal. You both want to enjoy a moment that you should never forget, so make sure you’re both in a good emotional place before asking her hand in marriage.
You’ve talked about your future together
If she doesn’t see herself still being with you when you’re old and gray, she probably won’t have ever alluded to it. Was the enthusiasm about buying a place together and having kids all yours? If she wholeheartedly shares her wishes and wants for future life with you, then a marriage proposal is already the next logical step for her. She’s displaying confidence in your relationship and letting you know that your future together is assured.
She’s dropping hints
Talking about your future home together might just be her way of hinting that she’s ready to move things forward. Is she already looking up potential real estate to buy together? Does she talk of the quality of schools in the area? Or, perhaps she’s less subtle and drags you with her to peer into jewelry store windows. There aren’t many women who are comfortable with making a proposal themselves, so by dropping hints she’s saying, ‘I’m ready if you are.’
If you’re still unsure about whether now is a good time to propose, then it probably isn’t. A proposal and the following consequences are life-changing. This is one decision that you cannot waver about. However, if after reading these tips your gut instinct is telling you to go for it, then trust that feeling.
Content Author: Amy Harrison
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